and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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