Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
