i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
