i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
