Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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