do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
