Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
