Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Randomize
