wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
