he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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