I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize