My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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