I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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