I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Randomize
