Swine flu. Run for my life!
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
we should paint friendship bongs
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