normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
