I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Randomize
