So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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