he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
