Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
