No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
