Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just forgot I was standing up.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
