Betty ford says i'm here all night
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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