the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
17 year olds will be the death of me.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
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