Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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