How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
