Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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