Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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