why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
