toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
