So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
