Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
