If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
