god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Randomize
