i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Randomize
