i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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