I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
