too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
