Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
