I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
