Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
