I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Randomize