A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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