We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize