You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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