Sponge bath it is.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
