So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize