that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
i dont even know how to be here
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I said "one day" and that day is not today
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Randomize
