I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize