Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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