Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
